I have a habit of not checking my e-mails for days, and then showing up to find a glut of subscription messages updating me on the updates of my updates, and ultimately having to dig through the morass to find any worthwhile e-mails. One caught my eye. It didn't have a title, and didn't say from whom it was (unless you want to count "..."). Well, me being the Curious Cat that I am, I opened it, to find a single line with two poorly-written sentences...

respect the lakers you would not bash a team that been owning you in the playoff 2-8 remember? you know 2-1 in the reg season mean nothing

Um... seriously? I mean, seriously?! I've have never before in my life gotten a basketball-related e-mail, and the first one is from a Lakers fan that felt the need to e-mail me to tell me to "respect the lakers" and accusing me of bashing them.  Wow. I was expecting that first e-mail to be Nate or Andrew telling me I've won a yellow Denver Stiffs T-shirt for being an awesome member of the site, and all I need to do is pay for the $39.99 delivery fee, not some hubbubbed Laker fan from Sunnyvale, California (aren't you supposed to be supporting Golden State?), in need of a self-esteem massage.

I'm really beside myself. I don't even remember bashing the Lakers recently.

*...ruminates for an inordinate period of time...*

Well, I really have to hand it to these Laker Doods. For all the idiocy of the Black Hole and the classlessness of Chargers fans, I still don't find them trolling MHR and then randomly sending me ill-conceived, slightly aggressive e-mails. Same goes for Red Wings fans.

Yup. You're in a class of your own, my friends. I totally feel for your neurotic insecurity. Now, about that T-shirt...

I want this one, preferably in XXSS (that's extra-extra-super-small):